8-bit Penis Scarf

8- Bit Penis Scarf

By Connie Stieler

Inspired by a post seen here…8-Bit Penis Scarf.

This scarf will amaze and dazzle, or terrify people wherever you go!  The ultimate gag gift or bridal shower accessory!  This pattern is available for FREE to Knotty Hookers everywhere! Yes I did take quite some time to get this beauty ready but in the end it was not my original idea.  There were no apparent resources included with the original photo even after days of searching so this is simply my interpretation.  This pattern has not been tested but I feel my notes were accurate, I will not claim them to be perfect I am human after all.  Please enjoy and post your pics online, I would love to see what you come up with!

Please note that this is pattern is better suited for intermediate/experienced crocheters and isn't beginner friendly.

 You will need to prepare bobbins in advance or use separate skeins for colour changes as you do not want to carry your yarn in this project, just simply drop until you come back to it on the next row when you will need it again.
When changing colours, do so by finishing previous stitch with the new colour.

Loops & Threads Impeccable
Lippy for main colour = P
Rich Orchid for head  = O
Black                           = B
J or 6mm hook

Ch 2 counts as first stitch throughout pattern unless otherwise stated.
On return row, you will sc in to 1st ch of turning ch 2.

Starting at widest part of testicles.
- Starting with B ch 3, P ch 29, B ch 1, P ch 29, B ch 3. Ch 2 turn.

- Working in purl bump behind chain (this helps tremendously when finishing bottom portion of scarf) sc in 2nd ch from hook and across row, changing colours as needed.  End of row should read 4 B, 30 P, 2 B, 30 P, 4 B. Ch 2 turn. ( 70 st )

- Repeat 9 times more ( 10 rows total ).

Continue in this manner for 6 more rows, eliminating the 2 B in the middle of the row.
At end of 6th row ch 1 instead of 2. Turn.

- Sl st into 1st 4 st and 1st P st. Ch 1, sc in same st. Sc in next 3 st. P sc across row to last 4 P st of previous row. 4 B sc, ch 2 turn.
End of row should read 4 B, 54 P, 4 B. ( 62 st )

- 3 B, 54 P, 4 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 2 more times ( 4 rows total )
At end of 4th row, ch 1 instead of 2. Turn.

- Sl st into 1st 4 st and 1st P st. Ch 1, sc in same st. Sc in next 3 st. P sc across row to last 4 P st of previous row. 4 B sc, ch 2 turn.
- 3 B, 46 P, 4 B, ch 2, turn.
Repeat 4 times more. ( 6 rows total)
At end of 6th row ch 1 instead of 2. Turn. ( 54 st )

- Sl st into 1st 4 st and 1st P st. Ch 1, sc in same st. Sc in next 7 st. P sc across row to last 8 P st of previous row. 8 B sc, ch 2 turn.

- 7 B, 30 P, 8 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 3 times more. ( 5 rows total )
At end of 5th row ch 1 instead of 2. Turn. ( 46 st )

- Sl st into 1st 8 st and 1st P st. Ch 1, sc in same st and next 3 sc, P sc across row to last 4 P st of previous row. 4 B sc, ch 2 turn.
End of row should read 4 B, 22 P, 4 B. This row sets you up for the shaft of the scarf.

- 3 B, 22 P, 4 B, ch 2 turn. ( 30 st )
Here’s where things get boring for awhile…
Repeat 217 times more or longer if you desire.


- 3 B, 4 P, 13 B, 4 P, 4 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 4 more times. ( 5 rows total )

- 7 B, 13 O, 8 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 5 times more ( 6 rows total )

- 3 B, 22 O, 4 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 4 more times ( 5 rows total )

- 3 B, 10 O, 2 B, 10 O, 4 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 5 times more ( 6 rows total )
At end of 6th row ch 1 instead of 2.

- Sl st into 1st 4 B and 1st O. Ch 1, sc in same st.
3 B, 6 O, 2 B, 6 O, 4 B, ch 2 turn.

- 3 B, 6 O, 2 B, 6 O, 4 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 5 times more ( 7 rows total )
At end of 7th row ch 1 instead of 2.

- Sl st in 1st 4 B and 1st O. Ch 1, sc in same st. 5 B, ch 2 turn.

- 5 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 2 more times. ( 4 rows total )

- Using next B bobbin, sl st in 1st O st. Ch 1, sc in same st. 5 B, ch 2 turn.

- 5 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 2 more times ( 4 rows total )


Finishing Testicles

- Join B with sl st to 1st P st. ( Your work should be upside down now.  If you worked your 1st row into the purl bump of the chain as recommended you should have a nice row of ch st to sc into.  This will make your scarf appear seamless, no one will be able to tell where you started. )
Ch 1, sc in same st. 3 B, 22 P, 10 B, 22 P, 4 B, ch 2 turn.

- 3 B, 22 P, 10 B, 22 P, 4 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 4 times more. ( 6 rows total )
At end of 6th row ch 1 instead of 2.

- Sl st in 1st 4 B and 1st P, ch 1, sc in same st. 3 B, P sc across row to last 4 P of previous row. 4 B, ch 2 turn.

*** - 3 B, 15 P, 4 B, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 2 times more ( 4 rows total )
At end of 4th row ch 1 instead of 2.

- Sl st in to 1st 4 B and 1st P, ch 1, sc in same st. Sc across row to last P st, ch 2, turn.

- Sc across row, ch 2 turn.
Repeat 2 times more ( 4 rows total )

FO ***

Second Testicle

With B, sl st in to P st. Ch 1, sc in same st and next 3 st. 15 P, 4 B, ch 2 turn.

Repeat from ***.

Pockets - Make 2

- Ch 18 + 1. Turn

- Sc in 2nd ch from  hook and across. Ch 2 turn.

Repeat for a total of 17 rows.
Leave long tail for sewing pocket onto scarf.
Use picture for pocket placement or attach where desired.
Pockets are made for a few small items and not for a huge hand, feel free to change it up!

FO, weave in ends.  Enjoy your hard work and expect a few laughs!

My finished scarf measured in at 69.5" long 19.5" wide at full ball span.
Happy Hooking,


*** ATTENTION!! I am so grateful and excited to add a graph for all you visual folks out there! Many many many thanks to Jenn and her team from Yankee Yarns who actually graphed this pattern and have given me permission to add them to my pattern for all to use.  I am completely overwhelmed with the response to this pattern.  Please remember that I am not a professional pattern writer and I have offered this for free based on how I deciphered it from only looking at a photo.  I sure hope the graph option will be helpful to everyone, happy hooking!***

What's New?

Hello there Hookers!  Life has been super busy and I have been neglecting my wonderful blog.  I have been working a lot and crocheting/knitting way too much.  That's right TOO MUCH!! The winter months had me filling orders from here to the moon and because of this I injured my left hand.  Carpal Tunnel is setting in and I don't like it one bit.  Luckily I am right handed, but you don't notice how much you use your other hand until it becomes an issue.  So I have decided to stop doing custom orders.  The extra money was wonderful and having so many people interested in my work was a great feeling.
 It came to the point where I was feeling much like a machine.  The joy of yarn work was fading in to the background as I just tried to get 'this' project done quickly so I could start on the next.   I was unable to just peruse Ravelry/Pinterest and choose something I would like to create for myself or someone I love.  I wasn't able to experiment and design my own patterns.  I miss the yarny adventures!
And now that I am 'free' from the demands I have no clue what to make lol. That's the way it goes right?  I have become a good little knitter in the past two years and I hope to make a sweater/cardigan for myself.
Let me share what has been keeping me so busy...
I was asked to make a few different minions for different folks, it was fun because each one is unique so that certainly helps with my getting bored of doing the same thing over and over!

As you see in the first pic I have finally acquired a model for my hats!! So I apologize for the quality of the last two pics but I didn't have the head yet!!  The hats were well received by all and I was happy. 
I based my designs using this free pattern Minion Beanies, I used HDC instead of DC, but used the pattern as called for when making the eyes. The closed mouths were done using surface chain.  The open mouth was created by using black SC, making a mouth shape, I used white BOBBLE stitch for the teeth and the tongue was red SC, HDC, everything was sewn on.  It was a little bulky for my liking but it isn't bothersome while wearing.  Free pattern for the bow can be found here Petite Bow
My kids were crazy when I was making these and fully expect to have their own Minion Hats for next season :)  
For those on Ravelry ConnieS Minions

Thanks for looking and Happy Hooking!!

Monster Monster High!

Ooops, has it really been that long since I last posted??? Oh life, you get in the way sometimes!  I've been busy busy busy these last few months, I'm back to work almost full time and my wonderful hubby is back in school!  We are very much looking forward to all the great changes coming our way.
With everything going on I still make time daily for crochet or knitting.  That's right, knitting!! I have taught myself how to knit and have fallen in the deepest love with my trusty circulars <3
My daughters are growing much too fast for my liking, and with growing comes new hats of course.  But I must confess, I've done so many hat orders recently I'm really getting sick of them!  My abilities stretch far beyond head wear and so I'm taking a much needed break from orders so I can just make what I want for awhile.  I  have a few hats I've made for the girls that I will post, and then no more hats until next year!!
My oldest daughter is probably the biggest Monster High fan out there, so when I came across a free Skullette appliqué pattern on Ravelry I was over the moon.  I surprised her one day after school with a funky Monster High inspired hat and she loved it, which makes me one happy Mama!
I also seem to spend too much of my spare time on Pinterest looking for yarny inspiration and such, so I thought it would be cool to pin something of my own.  I hadn't done this before but I saw so many projects from other people, so why not??  So I pinned this hat and I'm almost at 100 pins!  I was so excited that I decided to pin some other projects from my blog only to discover that other people already had!  So I'm out there and I didn't even know it!  Very flattering, so thanks to whoever that was, random strangers or loyal blog followers ;)

The appliqué is a free pattern from Ravelry, found here Monster High inspired Skully.  I used Red Heart Comfort from my stash.  The bow and the rest of the hat were made with Caron Simply Soft.  For the hat I used Neon Pink and Black held together throughout using a J hook with a basic HDC hat pattern.  
Thanks for looking and Happy Hooking!

Owl Mobile

So there were a few new babies born in our extended family this year and I couldn't wait to create something magical for a tiny new person.  I didn't want to make the usual booties and blankie, so over done.  Nothing at all wrong with that, I will always enjoy making anything baby related, but I wanted something really special.  Around the same time on Ravelry there was a beautiful owl mobile being featured.  When I found out this new baby was going to have an owl themed nursery I knew it was the perfect project! 
This particular pattern was available for sale but this year has been especially difficult financially and buying a pattern is completely out of the question.  So this is where my crochet experience (and the ability to scour the darkest corners of the internet) came in handy.  I was able to make this completely with found free patterns online.
I worked on it for about a week and my wonderful father made me the wooden top for the mobile.  I was so pleased with how it turned out.  I knew that the recipient is a beginner crocheter, so I knew that she would appreciate all the time and thought of this gift.  I wasn't prepared however to have her open it in front of 40+ people.  I was sooooooo nervous.  Its so ridiculous I know, of course she was going to open it in front of everyone lol.  I guess I have it in my head that most folks look down on the handmade items.  I feel that most folks enjoy seeing everything being purchased off of their registry. 
I hid the mobile in the bottom of a large gift bag and covered it with a cute outfit and some pretty socks that my daughters and I had purchased earlier, so when she uncovered the mobile I saw her true and pure reaction, all the while I thought I was going to have a heart attack.  To my great joy everyone in the room loved it.  She later came up to me and said that she was so in love with it.  She had realized as the shower began that she had forgotten to put a mobile on the registry and was hoping that someone would get one for the nursery.  My nerves were calmed and my heart was happy.

 The cute little owls were made using this pattern; Little Owls.
I crocheted two small circles and then joined them together, they kind of looked like cartoon eyes, then added matte black buttons.  I embroidered the noses and feathered tummies.  Not shown, there are cute little colored buttons sewn to the tops of the wings. 

I used this pattern for the Little Flowers and Leaves .  I used some fine thread and some well placed knots to string them all together.  This is by far one of my most favorite projects completed.  
Thanks for looking and happy hooking!

County Fair

Hello Hookers, I hope things have been well!  What a busy summer it was for my family, we didn't get to go on any fancy vacations, but did a lot of day trips and fun outings.  A few years ago I posted a thread about a Round Ripple afghan that I had started for my oldest daughter.  I always have such great intentions when beginning an afghan and then after getting in about 20 rows I remember how much I hate dedicating my time to something so colossal.  But it was for my daughter after all, so I kept on trudging however slow it may be.  Well my local county fair is at the beginning of August and after having such a stressful year I decided to have some fun and enter a project.  I have never entered before so I was pretty excited.  Now being that I decided to enter just two weeks before the Fair I had to get my butt in gear.  I picked a small quick project that I knew would only take a day to make. I chose the Angel Wings Pinafore.  When I was quickly finished and satisfied I started eyeing up the afghan sitting in my project bag.  I swear it was crying out to me, "Please finish me already!!".  So then I started thinking, how awesome would it be to enter two projects in the fair and actually finish this afghan?!  And then I never crocheted so fast in my life lol.  But I got that sucker done!!  I was soooo pleased to finally bring this project to life.  The Round Ripple Afghan was finally finished!! It only took about 2 years *hangs head in shame*. 
Well for my first time ever entering, I was happy to receive second place blue ribbons for each project.  Now, I don't want to seem ungrateful but I know that I should've won first place.  I entered the pinafore in the category, Dress For Under 2 Years.  The dress that won first place was honestly made crudely from an old pillowcase that had shoddy embroidery and random buttons haphazardly placed all over.   The afghan lost to another ripple afghan, the only differences were the colours and that mine happened to be round.  Now nepotism runs rampant in this area, so again for the first time ever entering, winning second place is not bad at all.  It just makes me want that big pretty red first place rosette even more!!!
This picture best shows the colours in the afghan, all picked by my daughter (her favourite colours)
Don't let this picture fool you!  The finished afghan measures over 6 ft from point to point.  My daughter thinks it is so cool that her afghan is award winning :)
 Here is the Pinafore.  I stayed with a neutral palette, not shown so great in this picture.  It is tan and cream.  My daughter claimed this also and put it on her giant teddy bear Honey. 
My hubby and kids thought it was so cool to see my creations on display, and of course it felt great to put them out there for all to see.  I loved entering the fair and can't wait until next year to do it again!!
Thanks for letting me share,
Happy Hooking!!